Sunday, May 18, 2008

gifts from myself

"To begin living like you've never lived before... begin living like you've never lived before."

A million years ago (or so it seems!) I was wandering the aisles at Powell's in Portland. I was determined that I was going to keep focused long enough to take it all in. When I am in a bookstore I get an overwhelming feeling of being amongst kindred spirits quickly followed by panic because I can't look at them all or read them all or find what I am looking for fast enough. I have to focus in a bookstore. I have to seek one section and one shelf at a time or I just wander around and eventually leave with a thumping headache.

While wandering around Powells (A CITY BLOCK OF BOOKS!) I found this little magnet. Clutching my book of Mary Oliver poems and my Laini's Lady, I added this magnet to the pile and made my purchase. I was late to meet Liz and Laini and I didn't want to make them wait. I got home and put it on my filing cabinet and promptly forgot about it. I did look at it from time to time, but I never really thought about it very much.

Yesterday I was trying to rewrite a scene in my novel and I was having a lot of trouble with it. I lacked the juice and the fire that I needed for that particular part. In frustration, I glanced over towards my filing cabinet. There she was, still ripe and full and spinning. She was exactly the inspiration I needed for the scene. She was exactly the image I needed to make the scene what it needed to be. I took her off of the bulletin board and propped her up on my desk.

That sort of thing happens to me a lot. I often find that something I found or bought or scribbled down and tucked into a book is exactly and precisely what I need when I find it again. It's like I am my own little fairy godmother. I also like it because it reminds me that sometimes we can't see what it all adds up to until we look back or until we look through or until we peek inside.

What gifts from yourself have you found today? What inspirations can you leave for yourself tomorrow? Magic is all around - especially if you create it for yourself!

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Megg--
thanks for visiting blisschick and writing such a kind comment! I will be adding you to my blogroll, since your site seems to match my own philosophically -- meaning it is positive in a world filled with too much negative. Funny, my partner is also a painter and I am the writer! We are very blessed to be creating our own lives on our own terms, aren't we?

bee said...

oh, sweetie...what beautiful words to come and find today. thank you. you are so very wise about this and i am going to think very hard and leave myself a bit of magic before i go to sleep...(but i baked myself a pie...maybe that counts.) :)

Jaime said...

Awww...your own little fairy god mother. I love that!

We really are so much alike. I thought I was the only one that felt like that in bookstores! I have never really gathered collective thoughts about it, but when I read your post, I sat there thinking, "uh huh...I so know that feeling!"
It can be exhausting,yet strangely addictive.

xoxo

Anonymous said...

Morning Megg,

I stumbled across your site by accident (if there is such a thing) and it was the best start I could imagine for my day. Adding a bit of magic.. Thank you for such an inspiring writing, I will certainly come back.

Naledi.

Anonymous said...

i *love* the magnet - how beautiful she is. thanks for sharing how your inspiration comes to you, it has reminded me to pay more attention as the thing i am searching for may be right under my nose!

:)

enchantedartist said...

This is such a terrific post Megg!

I created some magic for myself today...on my front porch...and by planting my new kitchen garden...I find that one little project can be the spark that lights your creative spirit...

xoxo

pERiWinKle said...

So when we come visit, should we "quickly" walk pass the bookshop...just imagine 4 overwhelming, happy, smiling, excited, don't know where to look girls in a bookshop?! xx

Anonymous said...

I may be wrong, but your magnet looks like a traditional Goddess symbol... (I recognize the swirly belly).

How you feel in a bookstore is exactly how I feel in front of my OWN books. I just have so many and want to read them all at once and to know it all and I don't know where to begin!!! ACK...

It's a problem. Do you think they have counseling for people like us?