"There are very few human beings who receive the truth, complete and staggering, by instant illumination. Most of them acquire it fragment by fragment, on a small scale, by successive developments, cellularly, like a laborious mosaic." -Anais Nin
As I sat down to write this post I found the theme song from 'Superman' in my head for some reason. I am not fully certain what that is about. Perhaps a big fat post is brewing. Perhaps I am about to birth some fabulous idea... hmmm... doesn't feel like it.
Where have I been? First I was stuck in a land with no internet for a very long time. Then, just about the time when my internet came back I was plunked into a land where I had to go back to work full-time. I've had trouble getting my act back together since then. I've been torn between the blog post that I would like to write and the fact that even I am bored of reading my blog posts.
Seriously. I feel like I keep going on and on about the same thing. I feel like all I want is to get my freaking act together - get healthy, get writing, get websited, get published, get... get... get... blah blah blah. When I started doing Morning Pages several years ago, Julia Cameron said that doing morning pages meant that eventually you'd get bored of complaining about the same old thing and that you'd start to get on with it. I feel like that this week. I am so BORED of myself I can hardly type.
I love that Anais Nin called our illumination: "like a laborious mosaic." The word laborious is about right. I feel like I am so close to creating something astounding. I feel like I am on the very edge of saying something interesting. I feel like I have a huge handful of the pieces and I am just about to finally sit on my ass and put them together. I need that so badly - to sit up again, covered in muck and glitter and ink, stretching my back muscles and looking down at the results of my getting stuck in - to finally have stopped talking and started doing. I wonder if other writers get so caught up in writing about writing that they never get a 'real' word written.
Does anyone else get bored of themselves? What do you do then?