(When we were in Exeter with my parents we walked by this amazing door and of course my Dad needed to see what was on the other side so he pushed it open. Turns out it was another door!!) (Deep eh?!)
For the last little while I have been doing a lot of thinking about all of the ways that I DON'T do the things that I want for myself. But when I started doing that today I could actually hear Dr. Phil in my head saying, "How's that working for ya?" So I decided to stop and think about the ways that I DO work towards my dreams. "Enough of this defeatist bullshit," I thought. Clearly I do more good than bad or I would not be living the life I do.
This week I have been up by 6:30am every morning and I have written my book. It's been my sacred date. I have pushed past my blockage (I had three characters sitting in a van for ages. Two wanted to be in the book, but I didn't know what to do with them,) and I am now bustling towards the 60 page mark - yippee yahoo!
This morning I found this quote:
Again and again in history some people wake up. They have no ground in the crowd and they move to broader, deeper laws. They carry strange customs with them and demand room for bold and audacious action. The future speaks ruthlessly through them. They change the world. -- Rainer Maria Rilke
It made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. I hope that in some small way by the end of my life, I have done something that changes the world - even if it is just for one person.
And then today I got this message from the Universe:
Live your dreams now, Meghan, to any degree that you can. With every purchase. Every decision. Every hello and goodbye. Every assignment. Every conversation. Every meal. Every morning, afternoon and evening. And never, ever, ever look back.
Reframe every thought, word, and deed from the perspective of the person you've always dreamed you'd be, as if your life was already as you've always dreamed it would be. Die to yesterday's illusions and be reborn to the truth of your vision.
And let's just see if you can handle the onslaught of treasures I send your way.
Your greatest admirer, biggest fan, and truest friend -
And it kicked my ass. I would like to report my friends that I am BACK ON TRACK!!
Some days it is easy to move toward your dreams and some days it is hard. Some days I can pay attention to the good things I've done and some days I can only eat my weight in sugar. Some days I am strong and some days I need to be quiet and still. Sometimes I feel inspiring and other days I need inspiration. I am so glad that when it is needed most, inspiration seems to come - even if it needs to come from inside, from the outside, or from the universe.